Marriage is work, and anyone who says it’s not is lying. Marriage takes time, commitment, effort, and a lot of give and take. When you decide to spend the rest of your life with one person, you’re going to spend the rest of your life with them and all their faults. Once the honeymoon phase ends and real life sets into your marriage, it’s easy to begin seeing your partner’s flaws more than you see their positive benefits. It’s one reason divorce is so common, but you can keep the thrill in your relationship and avoid divorce if you’re willing to put in the hard work.
Keep a Gratitude Journal
Dirty socks on the floor, the toilet seat is up, toothpaste all over your bath towel; these are all things your spouse does that annoy you endlessly, and it’s all right for you to find yourself rolling your eyes in annoyance when he does these things. However, it’s more important to let these things go and focus on all the good things he does by keeping a gratitude journal. He takes out the trash so you don’t have to touch that nasty trash can. He cleans the toilets because he knows it grosses you out. He cooks. He brings you flowers, and he always opens the doors for you and puts your needs before his.
A gratitude journal allows you to focus on the good aspects your spouse brings to the table, and it helps you remember to appreciate him rather than resent him. It’s also a helpful reminder that you are not perfect, either. You do things that annoy him, and you don’t want him to focus on those things, do you?
Get Physical
Even if you have to schedule some intimate time between work and the kids, make sure it’s on the calendar a few times a week. When you lack physical intimacy, you lack everything else in your marriage. It’s easy to forget you love someone when you don’t take the time to be intimate.
Date Your Spouse
Get a babysitter and get out of the house every two or three weeks for a few hours. Do some of the things you did together prior to having kids to remind you how much fun you are outside of the work, home, parenting thing. It’s a fun reminder of the fun you had together before life took over, and it has the power to take you back and remind you why you love this person.
Own Your Mistakes
One thing that causes marriages to fall apart faster than anything is the lack of accountability in the marriage. If you make a mistake or you’re wrong about something, just say sorry and move on. Don’t place blame, pick a fight, or try to make it his fault. When you both hold yourselves accountable for your own actions, you’d be surprised how much more attracted you are to one another.
Marriage is a choice that never ends. You choose to love this person. You choose to wake up each morning and continue loving this person. You choose to focus on their good attributes or their bad ones, and you choose to be happy or be miserable. If you want to keep things exciting and avoid divorce, you must choose that mindset. If all else fails you need good lawyers like www.primelawyers.com.au if divorce is inevitable.
